A 15-year-old story. I lived with a girl. Beautiful one. We lived together for a long time, and now we graduated from college. Work has begun.

One fine evening, she comes up to me and says that we need to build a business in order to make good money. And she had an idea.

The idea was to motivate me properly. She decided that we wouldn't have sex until I came up with and launched an interesting and profitable project.

I must pay tribute, she did well. After 3 months, she had to look for another apartment. We lived at my place.

1. I usually check right away if I'm okay. Maybe there are food stains on the clothes somewhere, or food is left on the face. You can't tell if he's evaluating you or just looking at you.

2. Careful peeks through a book or phone seem very pleasant to me and are not so flattering. It's just as cute when a guy turns away in embarrassment because you caught his eye. I immediately smile and blush. It's nice to know that someone is attracted to you. But if a person looks at you with obvious lust, does not look away and grins like an evil clown, it's immediately obvious.

3. I'm trying to figure out who he's really looking at. Probably some pretty girl. I was at an event. At some point, everyone, and I too, started dancing. Suddenly, a handsome man started making circles around me. And I just stopped and started looking around to figure out who he wanted to dance with.

4. It depends on the situation. Recently, a guy came up to my car and leaned on the hood to check out my breasts. It was so disgusting. I was even upset because the guy was cute. In general, it depends on whether you know how to behave or not.

5. Since this rarely happens, I always think that someone has finally seen a person in me, and even an attractive one.

6. When a guy pays attention to me, it immediately seems to me that he has decided that I am strange, or something is wrong with my clothes. The idea that he might like me seems so incredible that it doesn't even occur to me.

7. When you catch quick glances or playful glances, it's very flattering, and my day gets a little better. But when people stare at you without looking away, you immediately feel uneasy, and even sometimes you begin to fear for your life.

8. It depends on whether I find him attractive or not. I'm usually stared at by men over 30, and it's creepy because I'm 18. In such a situation, I try to move to the side where I am not visible, although there have been several cases that I have been chased. If you like a guy, I can look back at him and make eyes at him.

9. I answer the girls who write here that they have never been evaluated. Yes, you just didn't notice it, because most men don't stare openly, but work with a passing glance, like a ninja. It takes us less than a second to evaluate you.

10. I hope he doesn't come over to get acquainted and ruin my day. I came to the hardware store to shop for repairs, not to look for new friends. I'm surprised, but men in construction stare at me most of the time.

11. To be honest, I don't like meeting people in inappropriate places at all. But if someone asks for it, then on the one hand you have to be polite so as not to offend the person by refusing, on the other hand, many people do not understand the word «no» or take it for a hidden «yes».

12. Listen to advice from a slightly tired lady. Never follow a girl, assessing her from behind. Don't touch her if you decide to get to know her. Don't stare openly, don't point a finger at her. Leave immediately if she has made it clear that the sympathy is not mutual. Always behave respectfully. If you want to compliment her, praise her clothes, jewelry, hairstyle, but not her figure. Always stand up for a girl if you see someone starting to behave suspiciously. In short, just be a normal person.

See for yourself. You work honestly, 40 hours a week, but what do you have enough for? For food, communal apartment, rented house. Is the apartment your own? It's very difficult. A car? On credit for years, if approved. Start a family? And what to raise a child for and when to engage in parenting if you are constantly at work?

And then you really think — then why work so hard? After all, even if you give your best, you still won't have enough for a life worth working for.

Of course, there are those who do better — smart, educated, and have found themselves in successful niches. But even they feel the pressure! Mortgages last for decades, work until the night, stress, and competition is growing. And these are the successful ones! And what about the others? The system is slowly pushing everyone, it's just that some are stronger, others a little less.

I remember my parents telling me that previously it was possible to support a family more or less peacefully on an average salary. Now technology has developed, efficiency has increased, but it has not become easier for the common man. It's a paradox.

There are people who talk about lazy people. But maybe it's not just laziness? When automation develops, competition for jobs grows, and salaries do not keep up with prices — it is logical that people begin to doubt the meaning of super efforts.

And all this talk about «the market decides everything.»… The market may be efficient, but fairness is something else. A teacher teaches children for little money, a nurse saves lives, and someone earns many times more on speculation. Is it effective? Maybe. Is that fair? The issue is moot.

And the funny thing is that those who defend this system consider themselves to be realists, and those who are dissatisfied are whiners. But maybe it's worth listening to these «whiners»? Maybe they notice something important?

I don't know… maybe I don't understand something. But I intuitively feel that when honest work becomes a way of survival rather than a normal life, it's worth thinking about how to change this.

What to do? Maybe we should talk more about these problems and look for solutions. Support each other, not blame each other for laziness. Think about how to make the system fairer for everyone.

The story began in 1987 in a small town. Even as a little boy, everything was a struggle for Daniel. School was difficult; he had extreme problems focusing, leading to bad grades. Gym class was the worst, as he lacked any natural physical abilities.

But Daniel was determined to succeed in life. He overcame all his difficulties through hard work, studying three times as hard as the other kids and training outside of school.

By his late 30s, his difficult life had shaped him into someone who never gave up, someone who fought to overcome anything life threw at him. His engineering career was a success, with a high-paying job working on projects anyone could only dream of.

Daniel could overcome anything he set his mind to—a true testament to his talent and will.

So when Daniel was diagnosed with cancer, he didn’t give up. He fought that battle for five years, determined to beat it for his wife and three adopted children.

He had overcome dyslexia, social anxiety, and a near-fatal accident in his youth. He was a survivor. He told everyone he would survive. He believed in himself. Anything was possible with his mindset.

But Daniel died. Cancer won, and he didn’t. Leaving his wife and three adopted children behind. Leaving all of his wealth to his thick thighs Latina nurse, Gloria...

©Mad

There is no more True Aikido left out there. In this day and age, what they call Aikido is when two morons try to kick each other in the jaw and break each other’s joints. Or whatever else they do these days; never seen it anyway.

The True Aikido was completely different. It required that you defeat your Enemy without using needless effort. In fact, you didn’t even have come face to face with your Enemy.

Say, for example, your Enemy is approaching you with an axe in order to chop the fuck out of you. But you live in such a dump that on his way there he slipps on a pile of shit and falls into it face down, two times in a row. He gets so frustrated that he chops off his own finger. So who wins? You win! Perhaps you will not even know about the victory, which is victory in it’s best form.

Or else, for example, the Enemy decided to curse you out or harass you in different ways. But your cell phone is turned off for non-payment and you don’t answer the door anymore because some salesmen were bothering you. So the Enemy gets tired of ringing your doorbell and banging on your door, and bites his hand all the way through out of frustration. Here, you win again.

Another example: say you had no other choice but to come out on a tatami, or whatever they call it. The Enemy comes out too, growling. But you just stand there, like, you know, all barefoot, red spots on your hands and sniffing from the cold. The Enemy looks at you and all of a sudden becomes nostalgic about his barefoot childhood, remembers his little creek, a small carp he caught, his bobber and his fishing rod. He is crying now. He is not in a fighting mood anymore and goes home. On the way home — just like when he was little — your Enemy buys himself an ice cream. Than gets sick from it and dies.

As usual, you win again.

Unfortunately, there are no more Masters of the True Aikido left in this world. They all disappeared somewhere. Sometimes you look at one and think he seems like a Master. But he is not. He failed once, lowered his guard, relaxed, gave into a thought for a second. Now he’s been beaten ridiculed and slighted three times and is laying on the tatami with an axe in his back.

1. Beats headphones have special weights that make them heavier to look more solid. This creates the illusion of quality and durability. You pick it up and think, «Build well.»

2. I install acoustic and video systems of large size and power in stadiums and concert venues. The customer's specialists work with us. So, when one of them asks for the hundredth time to climb to a 30-meter height and change the angle of the speaker by a degree, then turn it on, I climb up there on the boom of the crane, take out the key for show and supposedly do something with it, although in fact nothing. After about 5 minutes, I say on the radio that it's ready, and turn on the sound. I hear the answer that it's much better now, it should have been done that way from the very beginning.

3. When my cat wants fresh food, but his bowl is full of food, I take the old food out of the bowl, put it on a plate, then I call the cat and put it from the plate into the bowl in front of his eyes. He starts eating like I just opened a fresh bag.

4. I work as a sysadmin in a large company. I noticed that when you change the monitor to a new one, it seems to people that the computer has started working faster.

5. Vacuum cleaner manufacturers specifically adjust the sound of its operation to make it seem like it is a very powerful unit. They probably watched how the exhaust of cars is tuned. I don't know who set up the sound of my vacuum cleaner, but it screams like a Boeing on takeoff.

6. Some applications have a very long download period. This is done on purpose so that you think that the application is very complex and heavy, so it takes a long time to load. It's the same with some computer games.

7. I talked to a man who developed the first ATMs back in the 60s of the last century. He said that the first models dispensed money very quickly, and people doubted whether the ATM had calculated everything correctly. Then the engineers tweaked something, and the ATM became more thoughtful. In fact, your amount has been calculated for a long time, but you hear some sounds and are sure that the ATM is working hard to do everything right. And this theme is still used today.

8. Now almost all toothpastes are mint, because mint is associated with purity and freshness in humans. Mint was added to boost sales, and it worked.

9. When the cake mixes first appeared, it was enough to add water and mix everything. But, no. Housewives found it too easy, and the mixtures were not in demand. Then their manufacturers decided to complicate the process by adding one stage. Now you need to break the eggs into the dry mixture. And that was enough to make sales skyrocket.

10. I work as a freelancer. If I hand over the order on the same day, the customer will decide that I hardly worked for the money. But I don't give you any reason to doubt. I hand in the work in 3-4 days, and the client thinks I've been poring over his order all this time, even though it actually took me a few hours.

11. Many people consider free shipping to be the best way to purchase something. In fact, the shipping cost is already included in the product price, but it seems to us that free shipping is better.

12. When I worked as a waitress, I was often asked by customers to turn up or down the air conditioner. I told them that I would go and do everything as they asked. I didn't really do anything, and then I came up and asked: «Is that okay?» It always worked.

13. The sound of car doors closing is currently being designed by engineers. It has long been possible to make the door close noiselessly at all, but people do not believe that it has closed. That's why we need sound. Research has been conducted on which sound gives a person the greatest confidence that the door is closed. They found out what that sound was, and now most cars close with that sound. Yes, I almost forgot, there are several sound options for different models.

14. I was engaged in training technical support specialists of a company selling mobile phones. The operators complained that it was difficult to convince a person to reboot the phone, although it helps in 90% of cases. I came up with this. Now the operator says that you need to read the numbers on the back of the battery (then they were removable). The person simply had to turn off the phone to get the battery, and then turn it on. If someone called again and called these numbers, the operator would tell them that the company had updated the system, and now everything should be working. Now many people have non-removable batteries, and we tell them that we will now launch a system update, but the process may damage the SIM card, so you need to turn off the phone and turn it on again in 5 minutes.

15. Marketers have noticed that if you can't skip ads in a video, it's terribly annoying. Then they made the advertisement longer, and provided for the possibility to turn it off after a certain time. It became less annoying. That's right. 10 seconds of ads that can't be missed is a silent horror, and a minute of ads that can be turned off after 15 seconds is fine.

16. Our restaurant's menu says that if you want the chef to cook the dish himself, it will cost an additional $30. And every day there were people who ordered dishes from the chef. In fact, we brought them the most ordinary dishes made by our chefs. Many visitors praised the chef's dishes and said that they tasted better than usual.

17. At the gas station where I work, there is a tire pump. They came up with this stuff. The air is supplied through three hoses, and in fact, ordinary air is blowing from each hose. So, connected to the same air compressor. The sign «Air, free» was hung on the first hose, «Nitrogen, 50 cents» on the second, and «Nitrogen + Vibranium, dollar» on the third. And what do you think? During my 12-hour shift, there are at least 10 people who uses paid pumps.

My wife and I have a mutual «right to left,» in other words, an open marriage. We discussed this a long time ago, and it's acceptable for both of us. Except she's had 10 lovers in that time, and I've only had casual sex once. I'm not jealous and I'm not going to give up a free relationship, but it's a shame that she's able to find partners, and I'm a loser.

Some jerk attacked me, wanted to rape me. He knocked me to the ground, put a knife to my throat, and told me to keep quiet. I froze in horror, and he began to peer into my face. When he took a closer look, his face twisted as if he had smelled shit, and he said, «Oh… I'm sorry,» he released me and left. Mixed feelings.

The wedding is in a week. But my brother couldn't stand it and confessed that once they ordered whores to the bathhouse, and one of them was… My fiancee. I kind of started dating her a month after that, and my brother kind of didn't dare say anything… and then he couldn't keep quiet. What should I do?

I had an affair with a good friend of mine a long time ago. At the same time, she was living with her regular man at the same time, but we didn't really care about that — we were friends, and we had great sex. At one point, she declares that I have a great dick, a wonderful size, and she fucking enjoys giving me a blowjob. Flattered, I wanted more compliments and details. To which she calmly continues: «I love giving blowjobs, but my regular man's dick is very big — it almost doesn't fit in my mouth, and your dick is just right.» I felt ambivalent about her answer.… I still don't know if it was trolling or really a compliment.

Once, at the age of 19, when I was still a virgin, I just jerked off a completely unknown guy. We were on the train, we started talking, and something like this happened. No one had any mental trauma, we were alone in the compartment, and the guy just left. And I, a terrible prude in life, always quite calmly recall this episode: well, I wanted to, well, I jerked him off. And it was really the craziest adventure of my youth, and that's the saddest thing about this secret.

I just heard a wonderful dialogue in the bar:

— Do you have tea?

— Unfortunately, no.

«Then I'll have a beer.»

— We have a delicious Italian non-alcoholic lemonade.

— Well, no, if there is no tea, then beer.

Then:

One news release in the morning, one in the evening.

maximum — the program «News» or the newspaper for breakfast.

Disasters were known selectively.

Information was «extracted», not to be digested for days.

Now:

News of flooding or tragedy may come out of:

30 channels.

From 5 bloggers.

Reels, shorts, stories and also in the comments.

And you're worried not once, but 503 times.

The same fucking news goes around in circles over and over.

Original ad:

From Mike Partlow to **************@*********.org

Hey,

I have a proposition for you. I will give you $50 if you let me borrow your Escalade for tomorrow night. I have been trying to get a date with this girl, but the only way I was able to get her to go on a date with me was by telling her that I am a very rich and powerful drug dealer. The problem is, I am not a drug dealer, and I actually drive a 91 Honda Accord. She will know I am lying if I pick her up in that. The only chance I have of getting with this chick is if I roll up in your ballin Escalade. If you let me borrow it, on top of giving you $50, I will put a few gallons of gas in it. I promise we will not have sex on your seats.

Please help me out!

Mike

From James ******* to Me

Absolutely not. The car is not for rent!

From Mike Partlow to James ********

James,

I am willing to pay you up to $60 to borrow your Escalade. If you are worried about me messing it up, you can ride with me. In fact, you can drive it. I'll tell her you are my bodyguard. That would actually work out better, I think. Do you look like a bodyguard? You'd have to wear a suit, and possibly one of those earpieces with the coiled cord running down your neck. You should occasionally touch the earpiece to your ear, like you are listening to some badass security chatter. You shouldn't talk have to talk much, just drive and look badass.

Please reconsider my offer.

Mike

From James ******** to Me

No. That is stupid. Maybe you should try asking out a woman that isn't a materialistic gold digger.

From Mike Partlow to James *********

Golddigger or not, this girl's rack is phenominal. Tell you what, if you consider my offer and I end up getting laid, I will try to snap a picture of her tits with my cellphone and send it to you. Trust me, they are great.

Mike

From James ******** to Me

Shut up. You aren't borrowing my car.

From Mike Partlow to James *********

Well James, you are being a cockblocker. I hope next time you are trying to get your D wet, you get the shit cockblocked out of you.

We were drinking with my wife's parents at the cottage. The father-in-law quickly drank himself and went to bed. My mother-in-law was silent for a long time, just smoking cigarettes one by one. Suddenly she started crying and complaining. Her husband fucked her literally and figuratively. He takes some hormonal medications, and he needs sex 3-4 times a day, and they're 63 years old for a minute. I had mixed feelings at that moment. On the one hand, I don't give a fuck about this information, on the other hand, I'm very interested in how he fucks her.

I'm 39. I recently persuaded my ex-wife, with whom I haven't lived for 5 years, to have sex. I noticed that my boner was much more stony on her 260 pound body than on the skinny ones who came after her, and in general it was better with her. I'm thin myself. But it was precisely because of her unwillingness to lose weight that the scandals began, leading to discord and divorce. Now I'm thinking of suggesting that we get back together.

I found out that I and a hateful colleague from work have sex together with same partner. I've never talked to him about «who else is he with», we just talk and meet periodically for sex. As it turned out, she has the same relationship with him. Well, now we have something to talk about and discuss. We are friends now.

The real magic of cowards. When you're so beautiful, dressed up, and wearing a set of beautiful sexy lingerie, do you expect to have great sex with your lover?… It won't happen under any circumstances!

But when you put on torn, washed panties, a bra contrasting with the panties in color, then there will definitely be sex! The fucking law of meanness.

One day we were visiting my brother and his fiancée. We were sitting in the living room watching a movie. During the break, there was an advertisement on TV about a super-duper loan, which you will receive without straining at all. The brother and the girl decided to take it and immediately began discussing which car they would buy with the money. A peaceful conversation turned into an argument, and the argument turned into a pretty big quarrel. They were never given a loan. They broke up.

I don't want to start a gender war, but how do you explain that almost all Stephen King horror stories take place in Maine and none in the state of Washington

I remember how we found out in high school that our classmate, a local good girl from the first desk, was giving blowjobs to almost all the guys who were there. The rumor spread literally the next day, and our classmate leaked it. Everyone's attitude towards the sucker has changed: some fucked up, some just looked crookedly, some pretended that everything was okay, but discussed it behind their backs. But I was killed by her reaction! She proudly said that she had such a need, and that was it! I didn't even realize she was branded now.…

We were lying with my husband, watching TV, and I decided to measure his penis. I got an erection, took a ruler, measured it, and was horrified. I don't understand how 6 inches could be enough for me. He asked: «Well, how much?» I replied, «7.5 inches,» and put the ruler away. He still thinks he's 7.5 inches tall, if he hasn't over-measured it.

I was on a nude beach for the first time. I'm not a nudist myself. I went in pursuit of new sensations. I chose a separate place, undressed. After some time, two young girls came, undressed and lay down next to me. The girls were very pretty with cool shapes. Naturally, I got a hard one after a while. They watched my erect penis with interest. And after a while, I came. Without even touching the penis. Just out of excitement. They smiled. And I quickly retreated.

A friend is trying to get with a girl. He's been in her friend zone for four years now, and during that time she's managed to fuck all his friends (including me), and even hooked up with his uncle.

I don't have a regular partner, I fuck with strangers, it turns me on a lot, especially fucking at his house, in his car or in a public place. But I started to realize that I wanted more. I want to be fucked by two men at once! I'm coming right out of this thought, but for some reason I can't make up my mind yet.