From Mike Anderson to *********@*********.org

Hey! I saw your ad saying you will pay cash to cut my hair! Well I just got my head shaved, but I haven't trimmed my pubes in about five months. They are pretty gnarly, and I jammed my beard trimmer trying to cut them earlier. How much would you pay me to trim my pubes?

Mike

From *********@yahoo.com to Mike Anderson

Mike,

Sorry but we do not trim pubic hair. This is more of a hair dying and styling place.

Thanks!

From Mike Anderson to *********@yahoo.com

That works for me too. My pubes are very curly, but I've always wanted to get them straightened. Would you be able to do that? Maybe you could put some highlights in, and just shape up my split ends. Also, do you have some kind of conditioner that would take care of my crabs problem? My prescription ointment doesn't really do the job.

Where are you located? I am free all day tomorrow.

From *********@yahoo.com to Mike Anderson

Mike we work on HEADS ONLY. SORRY.

From Mike Anderson to *********@yahoo.com

Here's what I am willing to do. You style my pubes, and I'll accept $40 cash instead of $50. You can even donate my pubes to those people with cancer who need hair, if you want.

From *********@yahoo.com to Mike Anderson

NO. That is disgusting. Leave us alone!