Found «thrash» tag in the Posts
Thrash stories 7
My mother says, «Oh, you've grown up, son, hickeys on your neck, that means you've got a girlfriend.» And I nod, like, yeah, Mom, life's moving on… But I'm burning with shame. Because there's no girlfriend at all. That's not a hickey – it's a bruise. And the story is this: I decided to try to steal money from a gypsy in a wheelchair. Well, I thought, he won't catch me. But that bastard jumped up like Usain Bolt on adrenaline, caught up with me in two jumps and started strangling me as if I had offended his whole family. So yes, the bruise on my neck is not from love, but from gypsy rage...
A doctor colleague told me this story. They brought in a deranged man who, in a fit of rage, cut off his penis. There was a sea of blood, but the doctors performed a miracle and sewed everything back on, better than it was before. So imagine the doctors' surprise when this guy was brought in again soon after, but… This time he cut off and chopped his penis into small pieces, starting from the tip. To make sure they couldn't sew it back on.
My boyfriend likes to put my hair ties on his penis and masturbate with them. He calls it a dedication. Now all my hair ties are «dedicated.» It's funny giving them to my friends when I know where they've been.
I have very few friends. So I hire a prostitute and we have very nice conversations, watch movies… Lately, she's stopped taking payment and we're kind of like friends now.
I put my shoes up for sale. A buyer was found. I thought that the man was probably choosing a gift for his wife. I was happy, rubbing my hands together. But he writes that he won't buy them, but he'll pay me to let him smell them.
I'm sitting here and I don't know how to react to this.
My husband and I went on our honeymoon, spent a fortune on the trip, so we expected the sea, the beach, and some cultural enrichment. In three weeks, we only left the hotel four times. All we got was a lot of sex. We were angry with ourselves, because we could have had sex at home, but we couldn't help ourselves. We promised each other that we wouldn't make the same mistake next time.
Six years ago, when I was studying medicine, several people from my group were sent to America for a few days for practical training. When we left, we thought we'd have a blast after work. From the airport, we were assigned to hospitals in pairs and locked in white basements that looked like a morgue. Every day they brought us 15-20 corpses, and we had to remove epithelial tissue. We slept with them in the room. There wasn't much space, and they were lying under our couches, on top of each other, standing against the wall. At night we would wake up because air was escaping from the bodies, the stench was terrible. We only saw the city through a grate in the wall of the toilet. When we got home, some of us couldn't stop drinking for a month. What a great trip that was.
I sadly remember how a threesome fell through when I was younger. I was staying at my girlfriend's place, she invited her friend over, we had wine, fun music, dancing, and then we were kissing in bed. My head was spinning with excitement and alcohol, I was going to be the hero of a MFF threesome. We were already undressed, warmth on the right – breasts sliding against my shoulder, warmth on the left, two more large ones pressing down on me. I was squeezing them, enjoying myself. And then my girlfriend suddenly snapped and yelled obscenities: «Get away from my man!» – the other girl got offended and left. I was lying there in shock with an erection. Now I have a family, two children. Ah, nostalgia.
Yesterday, my boyfriend and I were having sex, everything was going fine. Moans and groans, then he decided to turn me over, and in the «I'm on my knees» position, he started performing oral sex on me. A minute passed, I felt the amplitude of his movements change, and then he just ran away. It turned out he felt nauseous and ran to the toilet… What a fucked-up situation. First time in my life something like this has happened. I had showered before sex.
I like to masturbate while driving. I get in the car, take off my pants and underwear, step on the gas, and off I go. An incredible adrenaline rush! I feel like Superman!
I've been dating my boyfriend for over a year, and the relationship is losing its spark. To spice things up, we've been practicing anal sex. He took a long time to get inside me, but he finally did. It even felt good afterwards. When he finished and pulled out, I accidentally defecated on him, very liquidy. He immediately ran to the shower, and I went to bed, burning with shame. When he came back into the room, his words killed me even more: «Now that's what I call adding some spice to the relationship!» He promised not to mention it again, but I'm still ASHAMED.
I believe that money should be treated with respect. I collect all the coins I find lying around, I don't even disdain pennies. I believe there's a law of money circulation. Many of my acquaintances don't consider small change as real money, they leave it lying around the house or, if they accidentally drop it, they don't pick it up. And I've noticed one thing: those who have coins scattered all over their apartment because they don't need them, usually experience a lack of money, and vice versa. And my husband and I are quite well-off.
One night, we (me, my friend, and our boyfriends) went to a party at a friend's place. His neighbor, a huge guy, lived in the next room. We all drank together that night, and early in the morning, our friend had to leave. He said, «Sleep well, have breakfast, and then you can go home.» We got up (the neighbor was still asleep), washed all the dishes, cleaned the kitchen, bought food for everyone, and were sitting around cooking while drinking beer. And then, when the chicken in the oven started to brown, this huge jerk came out of his room and told us to get out of the apartment immediately. To our timid objections about the food and beer we had bought, he responded with threats of physical violence. In short, when the guy went to the toilet, we quickly removed the baking sheet with undercooked chicken legs from the oven, took the huge pot of half-cooked rice off the stove, and dumped all the contents into a large bag. Naturally, we also grabbed the beer from the refrigerator, after which we successfully retreated with a hearty laugh.
Happy hangover to you, asshole!))
I haven't had sex in a long time. My husband is far away. I started having erotic dreams. Yesterday I thought I'd come home from work, finish all my chores, and masturbate before bed while watching porn. I remember coming home from work. I remember doing the chores. I even put the vibrator under my pillow before going to bed. And then I lay down, and that was it. I only opened my eyes in the morning. I didn't even have the strength to masturbate. That's awful!
I was walking home when a sports BMW sped past me, driven by a girl. She splashed me from head to toe with mud, and I was already soaking wet. As she was turning out of the courtyard, she slowed down, and I quickly managed to mold a lump of mud and snow and throw it at her driver's door, right at the window. The window was closed. She stopped completely and started getting out of the car, apparently to beat me up, showering me with the worst insults. While she was getting out, I wanted to run away, but since her leg came out first, I managed to notice that she was wearing a fur coat and huge heels. Feeling superior in my comfortable clothes and flat boots, I decided that I would beat her up, and calmly let her get out of the car. She flew at me, and I grabbed her by both shoulders, shoved her into the mess she had spilled on me, and quickly ran into the building entrance, shouting that she was a bitch and a fucking loser! In the end, I was as dirty as a pig, but I was the hero of the day and victorious.
Other Thrash Stories
Thrash stories 6
I love jumping off roofs. In our city, there's this activity where you jump off roofs with safety ropes. The people who organize it give you a piece of paper before the jump stating that they are not responsible for injuries and all that. Well, a year ago I went there again, and besides me, there was a couple in love; they wanted to jump together. I was standing behind them in line. They were properly harnessed, and given the command that they could jump. They held hands and jumped on the count of three. The girl's rope broke, she fell, and her boyfriend was left hanging. She didn't die immediately; she lay there with a crushed head, looking up at her boyfriend for almost a minute, and he was screaming. I don't jump off roofs anymore. P.S. Nobody else from our group jumps off roofs anymore either.
My friend told me that she periodically cheats on her husband, and I listened without much interest, well, it happens. And yesterday she called me and described in detail how her lover had sex with her in every possible way… I'm shocked, why would I need to know that? And after the conversation, she sends me a picture of his penis… I don't even know why I need so many details? Maybe it's an advertisement?...
We've been together for a year and a half. We live in love, we've gone through a lot of crap together, our sex life is incredibly varied, in terms of positions, anal sex, etc., there are almost no taboos. He's seen me terribly sick, with diarrhea, vomiting, drunk… I know everything about him, we do everything that comes to mind. But he's embarrassed to shave his testicles in front of me and locks himself in the bathroom every time. What kind of secret ritual is this?!
I work in emergency medical services, and it's hard to surprise me. But this spring we examined a corpse in a wooded area, a girl, apparently a suicide or mentally ill. She left home at the end of February, and in April she thawed out in the forest, dressed in a light dress, sneakers and a Panama hat, with a drawing album, several pencils and pens. The album contained two or three pages of drawings — snowdrifts, bare trees, a snow-covered field with a chain of footprints and a sunset. She went into the forest in winter almost without clothes and drew the snow until she froze to death.
It was a long time ago. I became interested in palmistry. And it came easily to me. Reading people's fate from their hands, their past, present and future. Not seeing everything as it is in reality, but let's say, the vector of direction and the possible date of an event with an accuracy of up to a year. So I decided to learn to find signs of death in addition to simple signs. I succeeded, but I didn't attach much importance to it until I looked at my friends' hands one day. Two of them (a guy and a girl) were supposed to die in a car accident, and one was supposed to drown. And all in the near future. I warned them and told them to be more careful. A month later, the couple died in a head-on collision with a truck on the highway. And the guy drowned while drunk that same summer. After that, I quit, and I'm still shaking when I think about it.
Yesterday my mom said she had never watched porn in her life… so she suggested we watch some in the evening, since I'm a grown-up daughter now… I thought my mom had just had too much to drink, but no, she's asking for the same thing again today. What should I do, show her porn?! And what kind?
I was friends with a semen enthusiast. She was so obsessed with its taste that she didn't miss a single, let's say, available drop. She not only gave her boyfriend oral sex, but also squeezed semen out of condoms and ate it. She wasn't a «semen priestess,» meaning she didn't cheat on her boyfriend. However, at every opportunity, at parties and in clubs, she would ask acquaintances for their used condoms with semen. And they often gave them to her, some even for money. I asked her why she needed it, and the answer was: «Semen tastes good, that's all.» Well… to each their own.
When my brother was breaking up with his girlfriend in a big fight, and she was moving out of his apartment, he ejaculated into her shampoo, and she put pubic hair in his loose-leaf tea. It's not surprising that they got back together after a while – you'd have to search far and wide to find two such idiots.
For our 3rd anniversary, I was given socks, SOCKS! The most ordinary, cheap socks! When I opened the «gift» with a suspicious look on my face, something fell out of one of them and rolled under the sofa. Suppressing my righteous anger, I crawled after it, and there, covered in dust, lay a beautiful engagement ring! I crawled out, looked, and this miracle was kneeling with a blissful smile and saying: «Dobby wants to have a master!» It was both funny and sad.
I live with real pigs! My mother has let herself go so much that the hair on her legs is 2 centimeters long! She only showers when she needs to leave the house, which is very rarely. And the most disgusting thing is that she has farted up her bedroom so badly that it's practically impossible to go in there.
My stepfather washes himself once every three weeks. When he walks by, he leaves a trail of sweaty stench. And yet, they complain about why I shower every day, saying it's too often.
My friend is incredibly jealous, constantly checking her husband's phone, calling him from other people's numbers and offering to meet up, always searching his things «hoping» to find condoms or something else. Her latest test was spraying his jacket with my perfume and confronting her husband, wanting to see his reaction and how he would justify himself. But what happened was something she definitely didn't expect – he confessed to cheating. She checked too much...
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Thrash stories 5
I bought an alarm clock that rolls away on wheels when it goes off. The idea is that you wake up immediately when you try to catch it. This morning it rang, and while I was chasing it, I hit my head on the nightstand and fell asleep again.
We have a guy nicknamed «Terminal.» Why «Terminal»? Because he got drunk at a party, and someone, as a joke, inserted a credit card into his anus, and it WENT inside, and then the doctors had to remove it...
I work in a sex shop. There's a veterinary pharmacy next door, and because of its huge sign, animal lovers sometimes come into our store. Today, an 85-year-old woman with a dog came in. She stopped, mumbled something, and bought a rubber penis. Then she gave it to the dog to hold in its mouth and left.
My mother gives me hickeys while I'm sleeping so that my girlfriend will get jealous and break up with me.
This has probably happened to many people, and now it's happened to me. My loved one, with whom I've been together for five years, cheated on me. When I found out, I didn't make a scene, play the drama queen, or anything like that. I pretended everything was fine, and then, in revenge, I slept with his father. I'm not ashamed.
My father told me about a friend of his who went to jail for nothing. Yes, that happens. He slept with a girl, and she gave him an ultimatum: «Either marry me, or I'll have you arrested.» The girl's father was a big shot and had many connections. The guy chose the second option out of principle and served 6 years. He was released, breathed the free air for 3 days, and then went back to jail. Of course, it's cliché, but he killed that girl, hacked her to death with an axe, although I don't know the details of exactly how and where. Soon the murdered girl's mother died of a heart attack, and her father, a «big shot,» became an alcoholic and lay around outside the store, reeking of urine.
That's the story.
The end.
The most amazing sex I ever had was when my boyfriend undressed me, positioned me with my butt in the air, and shoved a bouquet of flowers up my ass, branch by branch. He slapped my butt and ordered me to stay like that while he was busy with his own things. I've never been so wet before or since.
I cheated on my husband. I told him myself and suggested a divorce. He refused. And that he actually liked all of this and wanted more details and to be present. My lover and I are shocked, we don't know what to do. Because we had planned it exclusively «for health reasons,» not to live in a threesome with a cuckold. I filed for divorce and broke up with my lover. I don't need this kind of drama.
My wife, if she hasn't had sex for even a day, suddenly turns into a real demon, incinerating everything and everyone, but if she has had sex, she's a sweet little angel. That's how things started between us, when she answered the question, «Why are you so angry?» with, «Because I'm not getting laid!»
Tonight I woke up from an orgasm. A few minutes later, from another one. I wasn't dreaming anything erotic at the time, and I hadn't watched or read anything like that since the evening. I decided that my body decided to pamper me this way: after all, this isn't the best period in my life without work and sex… Well, thank you! It's nice, damn it.
Hey everyone, so my girlfriend and I have a cat, and he's been driving me crazy. So, to get my girlfriend to get rid of him, I decided to poop in her backpack and say it was the cat. But she realized that this huge pile of… well, wasn't from a cat. We're not together anymore.
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Thrash stories 4
My sweetheart and I have been together for five years now. When she said a few years ago that she was ready for the first time in an intimate way, she asked me to do it while she was out, because she was very afraid of pain. I didn't want to at first, but she said she was very afraid, so I agreed. Situation: she's fast asleep after sleeping pills, and then the key turns in the lock, and suddenly her parents come in, see me naked and their daughter unconscious. The first acquaintance took place, damn it!
My boyfriend can sometimes drink from my glass if he gets another one, and that annoys me. And one day I told him, they say, it's unhygienic, suddenly he'll think about it and won't take any more. And he said, «Honey, I stuck my finger up your ass yesterday and then licked it. What can we talk about at all?» He finished my water with a straight face.
5 years ago, when I was preparing for an external test after 11th grade, my alcoholic neighbors were always noisy. Phrases like «give me my schmalz!!!» were often heard from behind the wall. And «what are you doing? You should have been afraid when we were demolishing the huts!!!» This fucking started at 11 a.m. and ended around five in the morning. Naturally, I couldn't sleep all this time. As a result of a week's lack of sleep, I wrote tests worse than I expected. There was a huge grudge against the neighbors. Before my admission to the military university, I lay and listened to a neighbor fucking a neighbor just behind my wall. Feeling no pity for these degenerates, I lay and listened to her screams and the sounds of banging on the walls. It turned out he was killing her.
Her underground, him in jail. Serves them right.
I graduated this year and my position has a good salary. Now I'm lying here thinking, can I buy out this empty apartment, tear down the wall and live in a 4-room apartment?
My husband had problems with alcohol, and after a long struggle with this problem, he decided to code. Now he doesn't drink. I wish I could live and enjoy it, BUT now we don't have sex. He doesn't have the slightest desire, either mentally or physically; he even lost his morning erection. We live like brother and sister. I am very sad.
My wife doesn't want me and expresses it very harshly.: «I'm not going to suck a dick for 20 minutes so that you poke me with it for 30 seconds.» I've been having problems with potency for the last few years, but what am I going to do? Finger caresses are not interesting to her, cunnilingus always causes some kind of inflammation (in her words), and with toys my participation in the process is very mediocre, and she copes better. She suggests taking pills, but I have concerns that nothing will work out without them later. What the fuck is necessary? We've been together for almost 10 years, at the beginning of our relationship we didn't get out of bed, and now: «No boner, no sex.»
When I was young, I often fapped. I was watching a movie on TV late one night, and my mom went to bed. I thought she was asleep, and I let my hands run wild. Then my mom calls me and asks who is moaning there (and I did it all silently, probably). I said I was laughing like that. And then, to confirm her words, I began to laugh, moaning. I have never seen such a reproach in the eyes of a cat.
My boyfriend is unrealistically dragged when I caress my own breasts with my mouth (fortunately, the size allows). I like it myself, of course, but sometimes that's what our whole foreplay consists of. I do, he looks and faps, and then sex. Somehow the effect is not very good, I'll tell you. I hinted and said bluntly that I didn't mind, but I would like him to participate in the process himself. But that's exactly what he wants, he gets pleasure from it, you see. :(
I'm married for the second time, and the second time I'm fucking wrong in my choice (( well, how come fucking people fuck you wherever they can at the beginning of a relationship, and a year later it turns out he can't do more than 5 minutes, you see, he doesn't need sex at all, but what the fuck should a woman do in such a situation???? If you got her used to it first, and then it turns out you just wanted to make an impression. I never cheated, but now I just dream of finding a good lover, the universe is sending you a request))))!
I went into the hospital bathroom and saw a woman washing her ass in the sink. You can't disentangle what you've seen.
I graduated from the university last year. There was a guy in our group who studied well, mostly closed for 5, but unfortunately did not make it to the red diploma. At the banquet on the occasion of our graduation (where some parents were present, by the way), he drank well and took the microphone to say a farewell speech. At that time, his mother was letting a tear of emotion run down her cheek, which is nothing shameful… So, when he saw her tears, he interrupted his speech with the words: «Mom, stop crying already because of this diploma. Well, blue and blue, fuck it...»
We bought an apartment at auction, which no one had lived in for many years. I had to spend all my savings for this, and also get into debt, but it was a very good option. Sorting through the trash, we found sugar bags in the far corner of the mezzanine, which contained whole bundles of banknotes in denominations of 5, 10 and 20 dollars issued in the 1990s. Only 14,750 dollars. How they were not found before is a mystery. But now there is something to pay off the creditors.
Brother's wife is preparing to run away from the family. I am 100% sure of it. For more than a year, her motto has been: «All life should fit in a suitcase.» She fanatically clutters up, but only in her own things. Tons of toys and children's clothes, brother's trash doesn't touch at all! She has already told her parents and brother many times about her suspicions, they just laugh — she looks like a «successful mother of four angels.» It's clear that this is a mask, and she got fed up with everyday life, groundhog day and wiping bugs. And my brother became openly fat and boring. Who wouldn't howl? It got to the point where she bragged to me that she had finally packed all her things in a suitcase. Apparently, escape is coming soon.
My wife is cheating on me. I'm 100% sure of it, and she doesn't hide it much. Why don't I file for divorce? It's about her father: he's a rich and influential man with connections who once helped me a lot to move forward in my career. I have a great relationship with him, but even before the wedding, he told me: «If you offend my daughter, you will be left penniless, I will contribute to this.» And I don't want to change my lifestyle and social status. I'm ashamed and disgusted with myself, but I know for sure that in the event of a divorce, my father-in-law will do everything to multiply my life by zero, and I can't do anything against it yet.
There are 3 good girlfriends, all mimetic to the limit. They say about such people: «They take a dick in their mouth with a fork.» So, over time, I fucked each of them with special cruelty. And each one said «in secret» that the other 2 couldn't stand me and wouldn't let me touch them. Hypocrisy is such hypocrisy…
When visiting, I can always determine the family atmosphere by the order in the apartment. People are in conflict with each other and with themselves with a kind of old shit: dried food, dust in the corners, some boxes with old shoes, things falling out of an open closet. Neurotics with OCD have perfect cleanliness: not a speck, not a speck of dust, not a hair. The children and the spouse walk along the line, afraid to violate this hospital sterility, because otherwise there will be a lecture or a tantrum. And how easy it is to breathe in a house where healthy people live with normal, adequate relationships. There's no shit, but there's no slickness either. Somewhere there is a mug of unfinished tea, somewhere there are children's shorts, wool in the cat's cot. And people smile at each other.
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Thrash stories 3
My boyfriend drinks a lot. And I absolutely don't mind. Moreover, I'm offering it to him myself! Because when he drinks, he fucks me until my knees shake, and then I can barely walk. When we do this when we're sober, he comes fast, and he doesn't have much of a boner… I feel selfish, but damn, how great he does when he's shit faced!
I haven't talked to my beloved godmother for three years because of my move to another city. Recently, she gave me her number through my mom and asked me to send her at least some pictures to see how I've grown up. I accidentally sent a photo with my husband's cock in my mouth. Yeah, I'm grown up alright. I've never been so ashamed.
At the age of 18, I fell for 45-year-olds (but there was no relationships then). At 20, I started dating a 46-year-old man. Then there was a 53-year-old man. My «record» is 60, and I wasn't with any of them for the money, it was all out of sympathy. I have a father. Some of my men were older than him. I can't tell anyone about my personal life, because no one will understand. I'm considered a loner, almost a virgin, and I'm very interested in sex, but… I love it a lot older, it's very exciting, but I don't want to be with my peers at all.
I do not practice anal sex, for me it is taboo, I have never given and will not give my beautiful ass to anyone. For me, the anus is not for entry, but for exit. But on the other hand, when I poop, I get tremendous pleasure.
I had a girl with huge breasts. When we fucked, they slapped each other or me so hard that I could cum just imagining it all. But my girlfriend and I broke up, and after her, I had everything as one, with size number 1. There was zero buzz. The girls are nice, kind, funny, but I stupidly wanted big tits. As a result, now I'm dating a hysterical woman, she drives me crazy, she might freak out over some small thing, but she has huge breasts, and every sex is a blast. I'm even ready to get married, because she hints at a wedding, although I'm not eager to get married. It's so stupid to get married for boobs, but I'm ready, I'm afraid of losing them.
I lost my virginity in a dream. No, I wasn't raped. I just had a vivid porn dream, something went wrong, and I woke up with the best orgasm of my life and a slight feeling that something was «wrong» in my lower abdomen. Three gynecologists didn't have a clue and confirmed the act of defloration. But I miss that dream. After all, I've never experienced such an orgasm again.
I work as a massage therapist (oriental massage), there are cute girls who, by their profession, need to be hurt first so that it will be good later. The most difficult thing is to control yourself when a half–naked girl is lying there, writhing and moaning. And you stroke her head and calm her down. But when you come home, you fuck your beloved as if it were your first and last time. You calm down from strong orgasms for 10 minutes.
I got a job, the team is young people, but I noticed that all the girls are, to put it mildly, «Chubby.» It turned out that the boss pays for lunch every day, provided that she chooses what her subordinates will eat. Naturally, everyone wants freebies, but the boss orders only fast food: burgers, French fries, cocktails with syrup… She doesn't eat, and the employees are slowly getting fat. I don't eat fast food in principle because I have a bad stomach. I was fired soon after, allegedly not suitable for them. And when we met, the boss honestly said that I looked too skinny against the background of her plump girls.
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Thrash stories 2
My wife and I have a mutual «right to left,» in other words, an open marriage. We discussed this a long time ago, and it's acceptable for both of us. Except she's had 10 lovers in that time, and I've only had casual sex once. I'm not jealous and I'm not going to give up a free relationship, but it's a shame that she's able to find partners, and I'm a loser.
Some jerk attacked me, wanted to rape me. He knocked me to the ground, put a knife to my throat, and told me to keep quiet. I froze in horror, and he began to peer into my face. When he took a closer look, his face twisted as if he had smelled shit, and he said, «Oh… I'm sorry,» he released me and left. Mixed feelings.
The wedding is in a week. But my brother couldn't stand it and confessed that once they ordered whores to the bathhouse, and one of them was… My fiancee. I kind of started dating her a month after that, and my brother kind of didn't dare say anything… and then he couldn't keep quiet. What should I do?
I had an affair with a good friend of mine a long time ago. At the same time, she was living with her regular man at the same time, but we didn't really care about that — we were friends, and we had great sex. At one point, she declares that I have a great dick, a wonderful size, and she fucking enjoys giving me a blowjob. Flattered, I wanted more compliments and details. To which she calmly continues: «I love giving blowjobs, but my regular man's dick is very big — it almost doesn't fit in my mouth, and your dick is just right.» I felt ambivalent about her answer.… I still don't know if it was trolling or really a compliment.
Once, at the age of 19, when I was still a virgin, I just jerked off a completely unknown guy. We were on the train, we started talking, and something like this happened. No one had any mental trauma, we were alone in the compartment, and the guy just left. And I, a terrible prude in life, always quite calmly recall this episode: well, I wanted to, well, I jerked him off. And it was really the craziest adventure of my youth, and that's the saddest thing about this secret.
I just heard a wonderful dialogue in the bar:
— Do you have tea?
— Unfortunately, no.
«Then I'll have a beer.»
— We have a delicious Italian non-alcoholic lemonade.
— Well, no, if there is no tea, then beer.
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Thrash stories
We were drinking with my wife's parents at the cottage. The father-in-law quickly drank himself and went to bed. My mother-in-law was silent for a long time, just smoking cigarettes one by one. Suddenly she started crying and complaining. Her husband fucked her literally and figuratively. He takes some hormonal medications, and he needs sex 3-4 times a day, and they're 63 years old for a minute. I had mixed feelings at that moment. On the one hand, I don't give a fuck about this information, on the other hand, I'm very interested in how he fucks her.
I'm 39. I recently persuaded my ex-wife, with whom I haven't lived for 5 years, to have sex. I noticed that my boner was much more stony on her 260 pound body than on the skinny ones who came after her, and in general it was better with her. I'm thin myself. But it was precisely because of her unwillingness to lose weight that the scandals began, leading to discord and divorce. Now I'm thinking of suggesting that we get back together.
I found out that I and a hateful colleague from work have sex together with same partner. I've never talked to him about «who else is he with», we just talk and meet periodically for sex. As it turned out, she has the same relationship with him. Well, now we have something to talk about and discuss. We are friends now.
The real magic of cowards. When you're so beautiful, dressed up, and wearing a set of beautiful sexy lingerie, do you expect to have great sex with your lover?… It won't happen under any circumstances!
But when you put on torn, washed panties, a bra contrasting with the panties in color, then there will definitely be sex! The fucking law of meanness.
One day we were visiting my brother and his fiancée. We were sitting in the living room watching a movie. During the break, there was an advertisement on TV about a super-duper loan, which you will receive without straining at all. The brother and the girl decided to take it and immediately began discussing which car they would buy with the money. A peaceful conversation turned into an argument, and the argument turned into a pretty big quarrel. They were never given a loan. They broke up.
I don't want to start a gender war, but how do you explain that almost all Stephen King horror stories take place in Maine and none in the state of Washington
I remember how we found out in high school that our classmate, a local good girl from the first desk, was giving blowjobs to almost all the guys who were there. The rumor spread literally the next day, and our classmate leaked it. Everyone's attitude towards the sucker has changed: some fucked up, some just looked crookedly, some pretended that everything was okay, but discussed it behind their backs. But I was killed by her reaction! She proudly said that she had such a need, and that was it! I didn't even realize she was branded now.…
We were lying with my husband, watching TV, and I decided to measure his penis. I got an erection, took a ruler, measured it, and was horrified. I don't understand how 6 inches could be enough for me. He asked: «Well, how much?» I replied, «7.5 inches,» and put the ruler away. He still thinks he's 7.5 inches tall, if he hasn't over-measured it.
I was on a nude beach for the first time. I'm not a nudist myself. I went in pursuit of new sensations. I chose a separate place, undressed. After some time, two young girls came, undressed and lay down next to me. The girls were very pretty with cool shapes. Naturally, I got a hard one after a while. They watched my erect penis with interest. And after a while, I came. Without even touching the penis. Just out of excitement. They smiled. And I quickly retreated.
A friend is trying to get with a girl. He's been in her friend zone for four years now, and during that time she's managed to fuck all his friends (including me), and even hooked up with his uncle.
I don't have a regular partner, I fuck with strangers, it turns me on a lot, especially fucking at his house, in his car or in a public place. But I started to realize that I wanted more. I want to be fucked by two men at once! I'm coming right out of this thought, but for some reason I can't make up my mind yet.
Other Thrash Stories
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