How do you envision the world of the future? Let's say in 200-300 years...

1. By that time, people will have created a highly spiritual civilization where violence and social injustice will have no place. All wars will cease, people will live in peace with each other and with nature. And faster-than-light spaceships will reach distant stars, where we will meet representatives of friendly alien civilizations who will accept humanity as equals into the Great Cosmic Confederation. — 0 points.

2. Oil reserves will run out, we will cut down forests, pollute the seas and oceans with toxic waste, and we ourselves will die of radiation sickness and skin cancer. That is, of course, if some alien snot with acid instead of blood doesn't finish us off first. — 3 points.

3. The world of the future will be covered in a four-meter layer of shit and radioactive ash… — 5 points.

4. Positronic robots will finally destroy human civilization and will live in happiness and harmony, striving to comprehend the eternal mystery of existence. — 9 points.

What phrase usually ended the fairy tales that your dad told you as a child?

1. «And they began to live happily ever after, and acquire wealth...» — 0 points.

2. «Linda cried and cried for her brother Derek, and then she went to the river and drowned herself…» — 2 points.

3. «From that very moment, every night the Black Hand would emerge from a spot on the wall of an abandoned house and fly to strangle sleeping children.» — 5 points.

4. «And that's when those vile, filthy homeless people dismembered the little homeless dog, ate his insides, and sucked the bone marrow from his paws...» — 12 points.

5. «Remember the main thing, my good fellow,» said Bogeywoman, «In the initialization section, in addition to filling the working vector, you should also install a multiplex interrupt handler!» — 17 points.

What do you usually use to make a fire outdoors?

1. Birch bark and brushwood — those are the helpers of a true boy scout! — 0 points.

2. Heh, if only you knew how well the Criminal Code and the Declaration of Human Rights burn… — 3 points.

3. A virgin's tibia, soaked in the blood of six Christian babies, will burst into flames on its own during a full moon if placed on the grave of a cursed witch and a spell summoning the supreme demon Seth is read… — 10 points.

Imagine you've invited a young girl you like to your home. She's a virgin, and this is your second date. Here are your options:

1. I'll offer her some tea, introduce her to my mother, and show her our family photos. — 0 points.

2. Heh, no girl could resist my charm. Of course, I'll try to seduce her. — 1 point.

3. I'll get her drunk on vodka until she passes out and have sex minimalist style. — 5 points.

4. I'll add five or six doses of equine stimulant to the girl's glass, and then call all my friends and acquaintances to rape her. I'll film the whole thing myself, and then sell the footage for crazy money to some illegal bourgeois porn site… — 8 points.

What do you think is the best way to get rid of nasty old ladies with shopping carts?

1. You dirty bastard, how could you even utter such a vile word! — 0 points.

2. They should be forcibly implanted with special chips in their skulls, connected to detonators that activate once they reach 70 years of age. The chip will scan their body and immediately trigger an explosion as soon as it detects the old lady rolling her ugly wheeled cart anywhere. — 2 points.

3. AAGRRRRR! Give me a baseball bat quickly! — 4 points.

4. We need to announce on Radio that we will only leave alive the granny who kills everyone else. — 10 points.

Have you ever lost your temper from anger and irritation?

1. No, of course not — I always try to control myself. After all, we live in a society, we need to respect other people. — 0 points.

2. Yeah, shit, after that party at the Tunnel. I'm riding the subway this morning, and there are all these disgusting alcoholics with distorted faces; sweaty, fat, enormous women and other disgusting freaks with sallow faces. Why didn't I have a chainsaw with me then: I would have chopped at those hands clinging to the handrails with a scream, turned everything into bloody mincemeat! — 4 points.

3. I generally think that a law should be established that would allow every person to shoot someone in the back of the head with a Magnum once in their life. Then people would be much more polite in their communication with each other… — 7 points.

The lyrics to what song are currently going through your head?

1. «I have happiness, I'll give it to you… I'll give you half of it...» —0 points.

2. «I have nothing… Because I have nothing...» — 2 points.

3. «Across the tundra, along the railroad… where the train runs to prison...» —3 points.

4. «Mazafakas are so ni-i-ice! Suck my d*ck… Kiss my ass! Frank! Frank! Frank Sinatra...» — 5 points.

5. «The power of the people, is leading us to the triumph of fascism!» — 10 points.

There is a poster above your bed that reads:

1. «Jesus loves you!» — 0 points.

2. «Bringing the achievements of chemistry into life!» — 3 points.

3. «Prisoner, remember: exemplary behavior is your fastest path to early release!» — 5 points.

4. «SAVE THE PLANET — KILL YOURSELF!» — 14 points.

How many pieces do you usually dismember corpses into?

1. What? — 0 points.

2. Into six, of course, is there any other way to do it? — 2 points.

3. That's a woman's job! A real man should only eat the heart of a dead enemy, having first torn it out of his chest! — 7 points.

4. You dismember… ugh, how rude! By the way, I have a container of concentrated hydrochloric acid at home… — 8 points.

The words you use most often in conversation are:

1. Work, family, big wash — 0 points.

2. Blood, hatred, shit, sperm — 2 points.

3. Shoot up, coke, orgy, overdose — 7 points.

4. Politics, oligarchs, president, faction — 10 points.

5. Plato, Nietzsche, transcendental, robotics -21 points.

RESULTS:

0 points: Rope is sold at the hardware store around the corner...

1 — 80 points: You have a strong moral core: you would never fart in front of a lady or roll a joint in front of the Ministry of Internal Affairs. But you, my friend, can't turn away from the slippery slope of moral decay: that's a fact!

81 — 190 points: As a child, you witnessed a homeless alcoholic rape a small pet hamster. This event caused your moral decline. Yes, you are a pimp and promoter of necrophiliac porn. Yet, once a month, you take out a videotape of «Back to the future» from your hiding place and cry because you can't contain your unrequited love for Lea Thompson...

190 — 259 points: Rope is sold at the hardware store around the corner...